Worst Top Model Ever

Wouldn't you know that the blonde whose picture I featured in the last post got the axe? Well, she wasn't my favorite blonde anyway. She was RV3's, though. Sorry, bud!

Last night's Top Model was a big dissappointment to me. Why, you ask? Because I couldn't watch half of it! That's right, the very thing I was afraid of last week turned out to be true- they used cockroaches. AAAAAAARGH!

The girls were taken to a runway lesson with Miss Jay and soon after, they had to strut their stuff at a show for a designer and his team of "fashion consultants" who looked more like club kids. That's because this designer is "auvant guard" (Jared Gold) and he apparently works for the dark side of the runway. His clothes look like stuff you'll see your goth/punk friends wearing, or maybe Marilyn Manson. They all judged the girls' walks but unfortunately for the girls, their runway walk included having Madagascar hissing cockroaches placed on them. Gina freaked out and they made a big stink about it but GIVE ME A BREAK. Tyra freaking Banks is scared of cute cuddly DOLPHINS but Gina can't freak out over the most hideous thing to crawl the planet?!?! What-EV!

Anywa, Jade won the challenge 'cause that sick witch KISSED the roach on the catwalk. I'd rather DIE. I mean, I couldn't even watch the show. I had to look away or watch through a squint so that if it looked like they were going to focus on the roaches, I could look away. It was horrible!

The winner of the challenge (Jade) got to take 3 friends to a fashion show where they would be VIP's. Fun!

Next the Top Model wannabe's had to work on their photo shoots. This time they had to fall to the side as the pictures were snapped whilst they wore- get this- FAIRY TALE outfits. Apparently, this was Tyra's brilliant contribution.

So pixie-haired Mollie Sue was Little Boy Blue (though she was very sexy and NOT a boy) while Ferronda made a terrible Cinderella (she was quite stiff). Jade worked it as Little Red Riding Hood. The best was...I forgot her name but she was a good, sexy Snow White. Or as she said, Snow Black.

At judging, the girls were forced to catwalk using impossibly tall stilletto platforms. They were like stripper shoes to the power of ten. As Tyra reminded them, you never know what a designer will throw at you (I'll say- they might want you to model cockroaches!) so you'd better be ready. She also pointed out that a "top supermodel" once fell in front of the whole world wearing such shoes. She didn't name names but we all knew she was talking about the famous dive her archrival (though they made up on Tyra's talkshow) MISS Naomi Campbell.

Well, the walking didn't go so well and Miss Snow Black took a nasty tumble and sprained her pinky toe. Unfortunately, Kari got sent home because...I don't know. I guess she can't walk (she tripped eve using regular shoes) and she took a not-so-great photo. Honestly, I'm not sure WHY she went home. But Nigel did say she need to "tone up" so maybe they thought she was fat. I think she did have a round face that still packs on baby fat but whatev.

See you gals next week!