It Was the Best of Times, It Was the Worst of Times

Last week something happened which affected me emotionally because it had to do with my family. I was very depressed about it and my immediate reaction was that I shouldn't even go to church anymore because I felt that I was obviously not growing spiritually, that I was still this wretch of a sinner.

Still, I went that Sunday. Sure, I left right away. But I also read the Bible regardless of how I felt and all the doubts that swirled in my heart and mind. I made sure to tell people how I was feeling and ask for their help. I also went to church on Thursday. By Saturday things had very much settled down not only in that aspect (with my family) but also I had stopped feeling doubtful and was resolved to stay in church. The great thing is I had arranged to meet with a friend from church (a "sister in Christ") who unbeknownst to me was going through almost exact cirmcumstances and struggles with family. I was very encouraged to know it wasn't just me and that I could overcome this. She was very generous in her words of encouragement to me. Later that day I also got together with my best friend from church and she also had kind words for me and praised my willingness to work on my character and not give up (and my honesty about wanting to).

All in all I came out of it feeling better than ever. And today at church I was even more encouraged when a sister I don't know well at all approached me about wanting to really build a friendship with me and saying that she knew she could learn from me because I've been faithful for nearly 10 years. So we're having breakfast Saturday barring her having to work. I am very happy that God saw to it that I received these special gentle words and also that I resolved something with two other dear friends, one of whom I haven't seen in a long time and I worry about a great deal. He has really shown me how much He cares even when I think all is lost.

Also, I have been communicating with someone I met in Arizona during my trip out there and feel greatly inspired by that. I won't say more except it's a wonderful life!